Pre-Hospital Feelings

Hello peeps.

This Thursday (26th March) I am back at Harefield Hospital to get my lungs checked. I feel positive and hope all will go fine. The only struggles I have, is when it comes to the lung function tests. I tend to get nervous and panick which affects how I breathe into the machine bringing about low results. I know if I can't get them up....my doctor will think it's the first sign of rejection and want to keep me in for further tests..poo hoo. And, this happens every check up and I wish I could shift my pre-nerves on this matter.

Every day (well almost) I do my own spirometry and therefore know my lung function is fine. I do change every day from results varying high one day to low another day. But over a period of time it is always like this, and my Doctor has said that's fine as if you draw a line throughout the up/downs...it is showing stability. Not sure if that makes sense to any of you, but I gained reassurance from this.

Other tests include plenty of blood tests, and believe it or not - even after nearly 3 years of this, I still don't know what they are all for..hahahaha. I think I may write it down this time and actually be "with it" as to what and why they are doing with my blood!! But from what I do understand it is checking my kidneys (as the medications affect this...some people even need a kidney transplant too later on down the line), and checking my tac levels (again to do with my medications). The rest I will endeavour to fine out for my knowledge and all of you wishing to know too.

Then off for a lung X-Ray....into a cold room wearing a flowery hospital gown!!!! Not my idea of casual wear with jeans!!

I have to have a good result day, as my holiday is in about 2 weeks now. If my Doctor has any concerns with my lungs...then it may be a case of...."man overboard" when I'm on that cruise!!! As I am going and thats that..and I will be fine!!

I am hoping to also meet with a few friends this day too, one being a nurse who previously looked after me when I was very ill, and an old mate who works in Uxbridge. Also to visit Sally, who has recently had a double-lung transplant and we have spoken via the internet for years following each others' journeys. I am delighted that Sally has also recieved the gift of life!!

So..other news...urmmmmm...exercising heaps, lost a little bit of weight from this and with eating better foods (of course I have bad food too...I can't always eat like a rabbit on cabbages and green leaves)!! Counting down the 2 weeks until my holiday...suitcase is out...clothes/shoes being decided upon. I'm sure there are other things, but, I think this will do for now.

Oh..I also met a lovely girl called, Charlotte who I visited at Broomfield Hospital - who knew about me and my story from being a "tabloid/media" face. Charlotte has a rare lung disease and requires oxygen too. It is quite funny really, as she has seen me twice in two different shops in my home town, and even though we have exchanged messages via the internet (I haven't seen her back when out in these places). I said you must actually say "hello" and not to be shy. I was quite taken a back when Charlotte said that maybe I wouldn't be interested in meeting with her as probably gets lots of messages (or words similar). Well, I wanted to meet Charlotte - so I did - Easter egg in hand, and even though maybe I am known for being ill (don't like people saying I'm famous)...I am normal and just like everyone else!!!

Have a happy week everyone, keep smiling, and keep well x x